I wander the house in some pathetic, non supportive boobie garment that does NADA for support. But... there I was, attempting to run 500, with “The Girls” out of control. Not fucking funny. I resorted to self support - otherwise known as running holding my titties. I have no shame.
Then the real horror set in. Today’s WOD is deadlifts and box jumps!?! Double fuck. Doing a box jump with big knockers and no support is like taking a baseball to the titties with every jump. In other words. UNcomfortable. AND... today is one of the few days I get to shine. I absolutely suck at 99.8% of CrossFit... but I have a shit heavy deadlift. That equates to me NOT sucking at this WOD. I had to take action. I refuse to be defeated by a large set of bosoms.
This is where I got creative. Trying to hold my boobs and manage high box jumps wasn’t going to cut it. I lack coordination and skill so I need all the balance I can get.
Duct tape? Hell ya!
Pride? Naw. This shit was functional. The “straps” were a critical component for boobie control. As you can clearly see, that alpha boobie (reference A Little Nip Tuck, Lift and Suck) is being a spiteful little bitch and eking her way out of the contraption. In all... this was a great solution. Fuck vanity.
Duct tape? Hell ya!
Pride? Naw. This shit was functional. The “straps” were a critical component for boobie control. As you can clearly see, that alpha boobie (reference A Little Nip Tuck, Lift and Suck) is being a spiteful little bitch and eking her way out of the contraption. In all... this was a great solution. Fuck vanity.
I rocked this WOD in 6:48
21-15-9
185# deadlifts
20” box jumps
I should patent this shit.
